been a month plus since i last posted a blog... many things had happen.. and i find myself hardly able to cope with things anymore... things that happened in camp are confidential so can't really say too much abt it... only wanted to write out how terrible a person can get..
everyone knows that there are some who went to work with their feelings.. meaning to say if that person is happy he will be good to everyone and vice vesa.. that kind of person is the hardest to work with.. cuz u wun know when he will go beserk and scold everyone.. i met 2 guys till now that had this prob.. but 1 is better cuz can see he did change.. but another is the worst case.. i am too stress out by him till the point that i cant slp well at night.. and mentally is too mixed.. unable to concentrate work at hand anymore.. having to worry wat will happen if i din do this and if i do tat.. to top things off.. he is very and i stress the work "very", un-reasonable.. no point talking to him abt how u feel cuz he will tell u his mind and force u to accept it.. i was told not to be too stubbon.. but i juz cant stand things being too un-reasonable.. for the first time i had this feeling of crying my heart out on things other than BGR since she left me.. everyday on the way home i would think of her.. but i had to tell myself that everything had ended since she left me the 2nd time.. i'm cracking up.. needed help but where? i need someone who had to power..
having wrote these out, i began to ponder whether things are to stress for me or am i giving myself too much stress?? i reckon the latter.. but how can i stop giving myself too much stress?? normally i had some1 by my side to take away all these problems but she had left.. i'm starting to get sick of life.. i wan to make a difference in everything.. organisation like the SAF needs sth better than now.. but i dun see them doing the stuff.. instead they went left it behind and proceed with other things.. 3G means 3rd Generation right?? wat does it mean?? better education and surroundings for new age ppl?? or living in the old and working in the new??
thats sth to ponder abt..

MeLzzz's feeling at 10:27 PM.